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anxious sidra is anxious
Aug. 22nd, 2010 05:48 pmFuck you, anxiety.
I dozed last night while waiting for my friend who is giving me his treadmill to get off work, and woke up again just shy of midnight (early evening for him), so we moved the machine into my apartment, in the process, apparently, losing the nifty magnet-switch thingy that'll actually turn the fucker on.
That's not so awful, I mean, there are replacement parts, there's only so many places the damn thing could have fallen off between his apt and mine so we may actually find it. I remain confident that something can be done. And if it can't, I remain confident his feelings won't be hurt if I ask him to take it away because I can't use it.
What's awful is that tired and exhausted as I was, I couldn't deal with having them in my apartment with the door open and the cat hiding for very long. Tired and exhausted as I was, I then stayed up until 2am, unable to sleep, until I got up and locked the third lock on my door. Like someone's going to fucking come in. Like if they came in I wouldn't hear them and wake up. Like I didn't study martial arts with the express purpose of injuring the man who comes into my home uninvited or handles me without my express consent. Like my apartment isn't a fucking minefield of crap to bump into - now with bonus exercise equipment!
And yet.
I dozed last night while waiting for my friend who is giving me his treadmill to get off work, and woke up again just shy of midnight (early evening for him), so we moved the machine into my apartment, in the process, apparently, losing the nifty magnet-switch thingy that'll actually turn the fucker on.
That's not so awful, I mean, there are replacement parts, there's only so many places the damn thing could have fallen off between his apt and mine so we may actually find it. I remain confident that something can be done. And if it can't, I remain confident his feelings won't be hurt if I ask him to take it away because I can't use it.
What's awful is that tired and exhausted as I was, I couldn't deal with having them in my apartment with the door open and the cat hiding for very long. Tired and exhausted as I was, I then stayed up until 2am, unable to sleep, until I got up and locked the third lock on my door. Like someone's going to fucking come in. Like if they came in I wouldn't hear them and wake up. Like I didn't study martial arts with the express purpose of injuring the man who comes into my home uninvited or handles me without my express consent. Like my apartment isn't a fucking minefield of crap to bump into - now with bonus exercise equipment!
And yet.